Creepy Kids Month Quick Picks and Pans

The Godsend (1980) A strange pregnant woman (Angela Pleasence) shows up at a family’s farmhouse. Before they can get her home, she gives birth and subsequently disappears without a trace. Kate and Alan Marlowe (Cyd Hayman and Malcolm Stoddard) raise the baby, named “Bonnie,” as their own, but one tragedy after another befalls the unsuspecting family. As their other children die off one by one, Alan is convinced the deaths aren’t accidental, but a scheme to replace them with Bonnie (like a human version of a cuckoo). Director Gabrielle Beaumont doesn’t rely on cheap jump scares or pools of blood for this slow-burn horror, film. Instead, The Godsend preys on one of the very real fears parents face – we do our best to keep our children safe, but we can’t possibly watch them all the time. 

Rating: ****. Available on Blu-ray (double-feature disc with The Outing) and Tubi

Cooties (2014) In this horror/comedy from directors Jonathan Milott and Cary Murnion, Elijah Wood plays Clint, a would-be horror author who moves back to his home town. He takes on a gig as a substitute teacher at the local elementary, but soon discovers that he picked the wrong day. A viral outbreak from tainted chicken nuggets turns kids into vicious, flesh-eating zombies. Clint teams up with childhood schoolmate Lucy (Alison Pill), her alpha male boyfriend Wade (Rainn Wilson), and other eccentrics to combat the grade-school menace. Although it’s more than a bit derivative of other zom-coms (especially Zombieland) Cooties has fun with its warped premise, featuring witty dialogue and gore galore. 

Rating: ***½. Available on Blu-ray and DVD

 

Alice, Sweet Alice (1976) Tragedy strikes an already fractured family when young Karen (Brooke Shields) is murdered as she’s just about to receive communion. Signs point to her troubled older sister Alice (Paula E. Sheppard) despite largely circumstantial evidence. Their estranged father Dom (Niles McMaster) decides to investigate, but the truth may not be what it seems. Dark, disturbing and perpetually suspenseful, Alice, Sweet Alice keeps you guessing throughout. Watch for a terrific, creepy performance by Alphonso DeNoble as a perverted landlord. 

Rating ***½. Available on Blu-ray, DVD and Tubi

The Space Children (1958) The title of this nifty little Cold War sci-fi film (directed by Jack Arnold) is a misnomer, since the titular children aren’t from space, but controlled by an extraterrestrial presence (in the form of a squishy glowing brain that resembles one of the eponymous “Gamesters of Triskelion” from the original Star Trek series). A team of scientists working on a top-secret military project (a multi-stage rocket designed to deliver an orbital nuclear warhead platform) are thwarted by their own children, who become the agent of the alien presence. Considering the paranoid era when this film was released, The Space Children is surprisingly critical about the proliferation of nuclear warheads, exposing the hypocrisy of using devastating weaponry as a deterrent for global war. Look for supporting roles by Jackie Coogan (wearing zebra-striped swim trunks) and Russell Johnson (as a hateful alcoholic stepfather). 

Rating: ***½. Available on Blu-ray and DVD

 

Devil Times Five (aka: Peopletoys) (1974) When a van carrying a group of psychiatric ward kids crashes, the adults perish, but the kids emerge unscathed. They find their way to a secluded ski lodge, where they meet a bunch of self-absorbed adults on a business retreat. The kids (including future teen idol Leif Garrett), soon wear out their welcome, with the grown-ups fearing for their lives. The stupid adults are picked off one by one by the obnoxious little twerps (who seem to have borrowed a page from Lord of the Flies), as they make one mistake after another (in one head-scratching scene, a woman goes to sleep while she and her husband are being stalked). The results are goofy and oddly entertaining, albeit improbable. 

Rating: **½. Available on Blu-ray and DVD 

 

Village of the Damned (1995) On paper, a John Carpenter-helmed retelling of the classic 1957 John Wyndham novel The Midwich Cuckoos sounds like a perfect combination. Unfortunately, the results are lackluster (despite the presence of Carpenter regulars Buck Flowers and Peter Jason), with little evidence of Carpenter’s signature touch. This version moves the action from rural England to rural New England. Christopher Reeve (in his final role before his tragic accident) stars as Dr. Alan Chaffee, a town doctor, who investigates the strange simultaneous births of white-haired children that possess special (and alarming) abilities. This remake takes several major missteps, losing the subtleties of the original film, and depicting the children as succumbing to a type of peer pressure, rather than a hive mind. 

Rating: **½. Available on Blu-ray and DVD